The Finger of Jesus

Who was the first person to see Jesus?

You might think it was Mary or Joseph, then maybe the magi, the shepherds, and the little drummer boy. But you'd be wrong. If the Book of Mormon is right, that is.

The first person to see Jesus was the brother of Jared (aka Mahonri Moriancumer). And he saw him more than 2200 years before Jesus was born. (The brother of Jared lived during the time of the Tower of Babel.)

It's a long silly story and I don't have time to repeat it here, but here are a few highlights.

The brother of Jared saw "the finger of the Lord" when Jesus was making some magic lights out of 16 stones that the brother of Jared had formed by melting some rocks.

And it came to pass that the brother of Jared ... did molten out of a rock sixteen small stones; and they were white and clear, even as transparent glass. ...

O Lord, ... behold these things which I have molten out of the rock. ...

... touch these stones, O Lord, with thy finger, and prepare them that they may shine forth in darkness. ...

Behold, O Lord, thou canst do this. ...

And it came to pass that when the brother of Jared had said these words, behold, the Lord stretched forth his hand and touched the stones one by one with his finger. And the veil was taken from off the eyes of the brother of Jared, and he saw the finger of the Lord. Ether 3:1-6

Okay, he didn't get to see all of Jesus, but he saw his finger. And that was spooky enough -- for both of them apparently.

I saw the finger of the Lord, and I feared lest he should smite me. ...

And the Lord said unto him ... Sawest thou more than this? Ether 3:8-9

Finally, after a bit more discussion, Jesus shows his whole body to the brother of Jared, and reveals that he is not only the Son of God but also the Father.

Behold, the Lord showed himself unto him,and said ... I show myself unto you. ...

Behold, I am Jesus Christ. I am the Father and the Son. Ether 3:13-14

So what's-his-name got to see not only the finger of Jesus but the whole enchilada, Father and Son.

I'll bet it looked a lot like this.

Giving up on the Bible

Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live. Exodus 22:18

Some things in the Bible are hard to understand. But this isn't one of them.

The meaning of Exodus 22:18 is clear and simple: kill witches. Kill them whenever and wherever you find them. It is your sacred duty, a direct command from God.

But Christians don't kill witches anymore, do they? Is that because they no longer believe in witches or in the Bible, or both?

John Wesley said that "the giving up of witchcraft is, in effect, the giving up of the Bible."

And he was right about that.

It's time for us all to give up on the Bible. Killing witches was never a good idea, and a good God would never inspire the words of Exodus 22:18.

Getting a tan from the Book of Mormon

The Book of Mormon is black and white about skin color.

White skin is good and "delightsome"; black skin is bad and "loathsome". In fact, God created dark skin just to punish people for their bad behavior.

And he had caused the cursing to come upon them, yea, even a sore cursing, because of their iniquity ... wherefore, as they were white, and exceedingly fair and delightsome, that they might not be enticing unto my people the Lord God did cause a skin of blackness to come upon them. And thus saith the Lord God: I will cause that they shall be loathsome unto thy people. 2 Nephi 5:21-22

This color-coding scheme was designed by God to separate the good from the bad and to keep them forever separate. God will curse the children that result from any "seed mixing".

And cursed shall be the seed of him that mixeth with their seed; for they shall be cursed even with the same cursing. And the Lord spake it, and it was done. 2 Nephi 5:23

And the difference between the races is much more than skin deep. God not only darkened the skin of people of color; he made them lazy, wild, and mischievous, as well.

And because of their cursing which was upon them they did become an idle people, full of mischief and subtlety, and did seek in the wilderness for beasts of prey. 2 Nephi 5:24

[But people of color shouldn't give up all hope. God's curse can be undone, at least in certain circumstances. An especially well-behaved dark-skinned person may become white and delightsome again! (See 3 Nephi 2:14-16)]

And readers of this blog should take note: God may cause your skin to darken if you spend your time dwindling in unbelief.

And the angel said unto me: Behold these shall dwindle in unbelief. And it came to pass that I beheld, after they had dwindled in unbelief they became a dark, and loathsome, and a filthy people, full of idleness and all manner of abominations. 1 Nephi 12:22-23

But then, that might not be such a bad thing. You'll be loathsome, filthy, lazy, and abominable to God, but you'll get a nice, safe tan out of it!

Everything in the Old Testament points to Jesus

Christians often say that everything in the Old Testament points to Jesus. But do they really believe it?

Does Malachi 2:3 point to Christ?

Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces.

How about Ezekiel 23:20?

For she doted upon their paramours, whose flesh is as the flesh of asses, and whose issue is like the issue of horses.

Deuteronomy 25:11-12?

When men strive together one with another, and the wife of the one draweth near for to deliver her husband out of the hand of him that smiteth him, and putteth forth her hand, and taketh him by the secrets: Then thou shalt cut off her hand, thine eye shall not pity her.

All the nasty, cruel, absurd stuff in the Old Testament points to Jesus?

If I were a Christian, I think I'd point these verses at someone else.

How many species did Adam name?

And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. Genesis 2:19-20

So how many species did Adam name?

Well, if you believe the Genesis story, "every living creature" was directly and immediately created by God in that failed matchmaking attempt. God hoped that one of them (the bot fly maybe) would strike Adam's fancy, but none of them did. Shucks! So God created Eve instead.

In the process, though, Adam named all of the species that God created. And he did it in a single afternoon.

So why is it taking us so long? Thousands of biologists have been working for for nearly 350 years, yet they still haven't named them all.

About ten days ago, the Integrated Taxonomic Information System (ITIS) recorded its millionth species. But that leaves another 750,000 known species that have yet to be included. And no one knows (except maybe Adam and God) how many unknown species are still out there. Some estimates put it at as many as ten million or so (not including extinct species).

So Adam must have identified and named millions of species on that fine afternoon in the garden of Eden. 350,000 species of beetles, 120,000 flies, 100,000 parasitic wasps, 20,000 nematodes. And he was just getting started. He must have needed that nap after he was done. (I sympathize with Adam. I spent a few hours this afternoon trying to identify a half dozen aquatic invertebrates.)

But it was all part of God's plan. He was trying to find a mate for Adam and he just got carried away with beetles, flies, wasps, and worms. Stuff like that happens in the Bible.