02 March 2010

God caused king Sennacherib to be killed by his sons

Poor king Hezekiah was upset, so upset, in fact, that he "rent his clothes."
And it came to pass, when king Hezekiah heard it, that he rent his clothes. 2 Kings 19.1, Isaiah 37.1
You see, Hezekiah had just heard the commanding officer (Rabshakeh) of the Assyrian army say that Hezekiah and his people would soon be "eating their own dung and drinking their own piss."
But Rabshakeh said unto them, Hath my master sent me to thy master, and to thee, to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you? 2 Kings 18.27, Isaiah 36.12
So Hezekiah, who didn't much like eating dung or drinking piss, sent a message to Isaiah, asking him what he should do about it. Isaiah told him not to worry. God would put a spirit (or "a blast" in the KJV) in the king of Assyria (Sennacherib) so that he will "hear a rumor" to return to his home in Ninevah. Then God will cause him to be killed with the sword.
Behold, I will send a blast upon him, and he shall hear a rumour, and shall return to his own land; and I will cause him to fall by the sword in his own land. 2 Kings 19.7, Isaiah 37.7
And that's what happened. Sennacherib returned to Ninevah and was killed by his sons while he was in church praying.
And it came to pass, as he was worshipping in the house of Nisroch his god, that Adrammelech and Sharezer his sons smote him with the sword. 2 Kings 19.37, Isaiah 37.38
But then, he was praying to the wrong God so he deserved it.

God's next killing: Josiah killed all the priests of the high places

6 comments:

Geds said...

Y'know what's really impressive about that? Apparently Yahweh was so good at distracting Sennacherib that two decades passed between him leaving Jerusalem and him getting killed by his sons...

Siege: 701 BCE. Death: 681 BCE.

skanksta said...

@ Geds - really ? tell more.

@ Steve and Yahweh - I think we need to do something special to mark your joint 100th killing birthday later this week.
I was thinking of sacrificing a first born male goat without any defects for you both, but I'm not exactly sure how to go about it.

Any ideas/requests/instructions ?

Abeille said...

http://www.wcg.org/images/b7/_0324122917_035.jpg

Geds said...

@ Geds - really ? tell more.

Um, that's really all there is. Sennacherib hit Judah around 701 BCE. He knocked a city or two over and did lay siege to Jerusalem. But he had to go deal with other stuff before Jerusalem gave up.

The rest of his reign was spent fighting in other parts of his realm. Then in 681 he was assassinated in a move that had absolutely nothing to do with his involvement in Jerusalem.

So, basically, god's vengeance is like Kramer's from that one episode of Seinfeld where he removed the anti-dessicant packets from the coats. Twenty years from now those coats are gonna dry right up.

Matthew Blanchette said...

Wow; chronology is even screwed up in the Old Testament!

Somebody (wink, wink) needs to compile a list of all the historical errors in the Bible...

Danny said...

Why do people rent their clothes in the Bible?
Because they can't afford to buy them.)


Funny thing about it. In the spanish version (I'm a native spanish speaker ) it says that he tore his clothes apart.