20 April 2015

The 110 Commandments of Jesus

Jesus isn't known for his commandments. Many people, in fact, think that he came to do away with the all of the Bible's commandments, even though Jesus himself denied this in Matthew 5:17-20.

He did have quite a few of his own to add, though. Here are the ones that I've found so far. (They are commandments 833-942 in the Every Jot and Tittle list.)

  1. Hear the words of Jesus.
  2. If any man have ears to hear, let him hear. Mark 4:23

  3. Listen carefully. The more carefully you listen, the more you will hear.
  4. Take heed what ye hear: with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you: and unto you that hear shall more be given. Mark 4:24

  5. Let everyone see your good works.
  6. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works. Matthew 5:16

    Having your conversation honest among the Gentiles: that, whereas they speak against you as evildoers, they may by your good works, which they shall behold, glorify God in the day of visitation.. 1 Peter 2:12

  7. When you help the poor, don't let anyone see you do it.
  8. Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven. Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly. Matthew 6:1-4

  9. Don't think Jesus came to destroy the law.
  10. Think not that I am come to destroy the law. Matthew 5:17

  11. Don't call your brother "Raca".
  12. Whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council. Matthew 5:22

  13. Don't call anyone a fool.
  14. Whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. Matthew 5:22

  15. Make up with your brother before leaving a gift at the altar.
  16. Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift. Matthew 5:23-24

  17. Agree with your adversary quickly, before you are thrown into prison.

  18. (You won't get out of prison until you've paid the last penny.)
    Agree with thine adversary quickly, whiles thou art in the way with him; lest at any time the adversary deliver thee to the judge, and the judge deliver thee to the officer, and thou be cast into prison. Verily I say unto thee, Thou shalt by no means come out thence, till thou hast paid the uttermost farthing. Matthew 5:25-26

    When thou goest with thine adversary to the magistrate, as thou art in the way, give diligence that thou mayest be delivered from him; lest he hale thee to the judge, and the judge deliver thee to the officer, and the officer cast thee into prison. I tell thee, thou shalt not depart thence, till thou hast paid the very last mite. Luke 12:58-59

  19. Don't look at a woman with lust.
  20. (If you do, you've already committed adultery with her.)
    Whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. Matthew 5:28

  21. If your right eye offends you, pluck it out.
  22. If thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. Matthew 5:29

    If thine eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: it is better for thee to enter into life with one eye, rather than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire. Matthew 18:9

    If thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire: Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched. Mark 9:47-48

  23. If your right hand (or foot) offends you, cut it off.
  24. If thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. Matthew 5:30

    If thy hand or foot offend thee, cut them off, and cast them from thee: it is better for thee to enter into life halt or maimed, rather than having two hands or two feet to be cast into everlasting fire. Matthew 18:8

    And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched. Mark 9:43-44

    And if thy foot offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter halt into life, than having two feet to be cast into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched. Mark 9:45-46

  25. Don't divorce your wife (unless she has fornicated).
  26. (If you divorce your wife, you cause her to commit adultery.)
    Whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery. Matthew 5:32

    Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery. Matthew 19:9

  27. Don't divorce your wife (even if she has fornicated).
  28. (If you divorce her, you both commit adultery.)
    What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. ... And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery. Mark 10:9-12

  29. Don't marry a divorced woman.
  30. (If you do, you are committing adultery.)
    Whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery. Matthew 5:32

    Whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. Matthew 19:9

  31. Don't swear. Just answer the question, Yes or No.
  32. I say unto you, Swear not at all; neither by heaven; for it is God's throne: Nor by the earth; for it is his footstool: neither by Jerusalem; for it is the city of the great King. Neither shalt thou swear by thy head, because thou canst not make one hair white or black. But let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil. Matthew 5:34-37

    Above all things, my brethren, swear not, neither by heaven, neither by the earth, neither by any other oath: but let your yea be yea; and your nay, nay; lest ye fall into condemnation. James 5:12

  33. Don't resist evil.
  34. But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also. Matthew 5:39

    Unto him that smiteth thee on the one cheek offer also the other. Luke 6:29

  35. If you are sued, give more than you are ask for.
  36. If any man will sue thee at the law, and take away thy coat, let him have thy cloak also. Matthew 5:40

    Him that taketh away thy cloak forbid not to take thy coat also. Luke 6:29

  37. If someone forces you to do something, do twice as much as you were forced to do.
  38. Whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain. Matthew 5:41

  39. Give to anyone who asks your for anything.
  40. Give to him that asketh thee. Matthew 5:42

    Give to every man that asketh of thee. Luke 6:30

  41. Lend to anyone who asks to borrow from you.
  42. From him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away. Matthew 5:30

  43. If someone takes away your property, don't ask for it back.
  44. Of him that taketh away thy goods ask them not again. Luke 6:30

  45. Love your enemies.
  46. Love your enemies.Matthew 5:44, Luke 6:27

  47. Bless them that curse you.
  48. Bless them that curse you. Matthew 5:44, Luke 6:28

  49. Do good to them that hate you.
  50. Do good to them that hate you. Matthew 5:44

    Do good to them which hate you. Luke 6:27

  51. Pray for those who persecute you.
  52. Pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you. Matthew 5:44

    Pray for them which despitefully use you. Luke 6:28

  53. Don't pray in public. Pray alone and in secret.
  54. When thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly. Matthew 6:5-6

  55. Don't repeat prayers.
  56. When ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking. Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him. Matthew 6:7-8

  57. Pray like this:
  58. (But don't repeat it.)
    Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen. Matthew 6:9-13, Luke 11:2-4

  59. Forgive others.
  60. If ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. Matthew 6:14-15

    Forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses. Mark 11:25-26

    And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him. So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses. Matthew 18:34-35

  61. Don't look sad and disfigure your face while fasting.
  62. When ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. Matthew 6:16

  63. When you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face.
  64. When thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face. Matthew 6:17

  65. Store your treasures in heaven, not on earth.
  66. Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth ... But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven. Matthew 6:19-20

  67. Don't think about your own life.
  68. Take no thought for your life. Matthew 6:25, Luke 12:22

  69. Pay no attention to what you eat or drink.
  70. Take no thought for ... what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink. Matthew 6:25, Luke 12:22

    Take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? Matthew 6:31

    Seek not ye what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink. Luke 12:29

  71. Give no thought to what clothes you wear.
  72. Take no thought for ... what ye shall put on. Matthew 6:25, Luke 12:22

  73. Seek first the kingdom of God.
  74. Seek ye first the kingdom of God. Matthew 6:33

    Seek ye the kingdom of God. Luke 12:31

  75. Don't think about tomorrow.
  76. Take therefore no thought for the morrow. Matthew 6:34

  77. Don't judge.
  78. Judge not, that ye be not judged. Matthew 7:1

    Judge not, and ye shall not be judged. Luke 6:37

  79. Remove the beam from your own eye before removing the mote in your brother's eye.
  80. Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye. Matthew 7:5

    Cast out first the beam out of thine own eye, and then shalt thou see clearly to pull out the mote that is in thy brother's eye. Luke 6:42

  81. Don't give holy things to dogs.
  82. Give not that which is holy unto the dogs. Matthew 7:5

  83. Don't cast your pearls before swine.
  84. Neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you. Matthew 7:5

  85. Knock.
  86. Knock, and it shall be opened unto you. Matthew 7:7

  87. Treat others the way you would like to be treated.
  88. Whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them. Matthew 7:12

    As ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise. Luke 6:31

  89. Enter through the narrow gate.
  90. Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it. Matthew 7:13-14

    Strive to enter in at the strait gate: for many, I say unto you, will seek to enter in, and shall not be able. Luke 13:24

  91. Beware of false prophets.
  92. Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Matthew 7:15

  93. Let the dead bury the dead.
  94. Let the dead bury the dead. Matthew 8:22, Luke 9:60

  95. Don't be afraid of people who can kill you.
  96. fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul. Matthew 10:28

    Be not afraid of them that kill the body, and after that have no more that they can do. Luke 12:4

  97. Don't love your family more than Jesus.
  98. He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. Matthew 10:37

  99. Hate your family and yourself.
  100. If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. Luke 14:26

  101. Take up your cross and follow Jesus.
  102. He that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me. Matthew 10:38

    If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. Matthew 16:24

    Whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple. Luke 14:27

  103. Don't find your life.
  104. He that findeth his life shall lose it. Matthew 10:39

  105. Don't try to save your life.
  106. Whosoever will save his life shall lose it. Matthew 16:25

    For whosoever will save his life shall lose it. Mark 8:35

    Whosoever shall seek to save his life shall lose it Luke 17:33

  107. Lose your life for Jesus's sake (and the gospel's).
  108. He that loseth his life for my sake shall find it. Matthew 10:39

    Whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. Matthew 16:25

    Whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it. Mark 8:35

    Whosoever shall lose his life shall preserve it. Luke 17:33

  109. Come to Jesus.
  110. Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28

  111. Take up Jesus's yoke.
  112. Take my yoke upon you. Matthew 11:29

  113. Learn of Jesus.
  114. Learn of me. Matthew 11:29

  115. Don't be ashamed of Jesus.
  116. Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels. Mark 8:38

    Whosoever shall be ashamed of me and of my words, of him shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he shall come in his own glory, and in his Father's, and of the holy angels. Luke 9:26

  117. Don't say anything bad about the Holy Ghost.
  118. Blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men. ... Whosoever speaketh against the Holy Ghost, it shall not be forgiven him, neither in this world, neither in the world to come. Matthew 12:31-32

    He that shall blaspheme against the Holy Ghost hath never forgiveness, but is in danger of eternal damnation. Mark 3:29

    But unto him that blasphemeth against the Holy Ghost it shall not be forgiven. Luke 12:10

  119. Go and do likewise. (Behave like the Good Samaritan.)
  120. A certain man went down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and fell among thieves, which stripped him of his raiment, and wounded him, and departed, leaving him half dead. And by chance there came down a certain priest that way: and when he saw him, he passed by on the other side. And likewise a Levite, when he was at the place, came and looked on him, and passed by on the other side. But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where he was: and when he saw him, he had compassion on him, And went to him, and bound up his wounds, pouring in oil and wine, and set him on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of him. And on the morrow when he departed, he took out two pence, and gave them to the host, and said unto him, Take care of him; and whatsoever thou spendest more, when I come again, I will repay thee. Which now of these three, thinkest thou, was neighbour unto him that fell among the thieves? And he said, He that shewed mercy on him. Then said Jesus unto him, Go, and do thou likewise. Luke 10:30-37

  121. Do the will of Jesus's father (or hear the word of God and do it).
  122. And you can be Jesus's brother, sister, and mother.
    Whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother. Matthew 12:50

    Whosoever shall do the will of God, the same is my brother, and my sister, and mother. Mark 3:35

    My mother and my brethren are these which hear the word of God, and do it. Luke 8:21

  123. Don't do iniquity or offend the son of man's angels.
  124. The Son of man shall send forth his angels, and they shall gather out of his kingdom all things that offend, and them which do iniquity; And shall cast them into a furnace of fire: there shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth. Matthew 13:41-42

  125. Be converted like a little child.
  126. Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 18:3

    Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child, he shall not enter therein. Mark 10:15

  127. Receive a child (or a disciple of Jesus) in Jesus's name.
  128. Whosoever shall receive one of such children in my name, receiveth me: and whosoever shall receive me, receiveth not me, but him that sent me. Mark 9:37

  129. Receive whomever Jesus sends.
  130. He that receiveth whomsoever I send receiveth me; and he that receiveth me receiveth him that sent me. John 13:20

    He that receiveth you receiveth me, and he that receiveth me receiveth him that sent me. Matthew 10:40

  131. Listen to Jesus's disciples.
  132. He that heareth you heareth me. Luke 10:16

  133. Don't despise Jesus's disciples.
  134. He that despiseth you despiseth me; and he that despiseth me despiseth him that sent me. Luke 10:16

  135. Don't offend a little one that believes in Jesus.
  136. Whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. Matthew 18:6

    Whosoever shall offend one of these little ones that believe in me, it is better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he were cast into the sea. Mark 9:42

    It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones. Luke 17:2

  137. Don't offend.
  138. Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh! Matthew 18:7

    It is impossible but that offences will come: but woe unto him, through whom they come! Luke 17:1

  139. Don't despise one of the little ones.
  140. Take heed that ye despise not one of these little ones. Matthew 18:10

  141. If your brother trespasses against you, go and tell him to his face.
  142. If thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. Matthew 18:15

    If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him. Luke 17:3

  143. If he won't listen to you, take one or two others with you.
  144. If he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. Matthew 18:16

  145. If he won't listen to the two (or three) of you, tell the church.
  146. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church. Matthew 18:17a

  147. If he won't listen to the church, treat him as a heathen and a publican.
  148. If he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican. Matthew 18:17b

  149. Forgive your brother 49 times.
  150. Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven. Matthew 18:21-22

  151. Let little children come to Jesus.
  152. Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me. Matthew 19:14

    Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God. Mark 10:14

  153. Don't defraud.
  154. Defraud not. Mark 10:19

  155. Wear a wedding garment.
  156. Friend, how camest thou in hither not having a wedding garment? And he was speechless. Then said the king to the servants, Bind him hand and foot, and take him away, and cast him into outer darkness, there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. Matthew 22:12-13

  157. Do whatever the scribes and Pharisees tell you to do.
  158. Then spake Jesus to the multitude, and to his disciples, Saying ... All therefore whatsoever they bid you observe, that observe and do. Matthew 23:1-3

  159. Don't do what the scribes and Pharisees do.
  160. Then spake Jesus to the multitude, and to his disciples, Saying The scribes and the Pharisees ... do not ye after their works. Matthew 23:3

  161. Don't let anyone call you "Rabbi".
  162. (Jesus is your only Rabbi.)
    Be not ye called Rabbi: for one is your Master, even Christ; and all ye are brethren. Matthew 23:8

  163. Don't call anyone "Father".
  164. (God is the only father.)
    Call no man your father upon the earth: for one is your Father, which is in heaven. Matthew 23:9

  165. Don't let anyone call you "Master".
  166. (Jesus is your master; you are his slave.)
    Neither be ye called masters: for one is your Master, even Christ. Matthew 23:19

  167. Don't be rich.
  168. Woe unto you that are rich! for ye have received your consolation. Luke 6:24

    Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus, that he may dip the tip of his finger in water, and cool my tongue; for I am tormented in this flame. But Abraham said, Son, remember that thou in thy lifetime receivedst thy good things, and likewise Lazarus evil things: but now he is comforted, and thou art tormented. Luke 16:24-25

    Then said Jesus unto his disciples, Verily I say unto you, That a rich man shall hardly enter into the kingdom of heaven. And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God. Matthew 19:23-24, Mark 10:23-25

  169. Don't eat until you are full.
  170. Woe unto you that are full! for ye shall hunger. Luke 6:25

  171. Don't laugh.
  172. Woe unto you that laugh now! for ye shall mourn and weep. Luke 6:25

  173. Don't have everyone say nice things about you.
  174. Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you! for so did their fathers to the false prophets. Luke 6:26

  175. Watch and be ready for the coming of the Son of man.
  176. Watch therefore: for ye know not what hour your Lord doth come. ... Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not the Son of man cometh. ... The lord of that servant shall come in a day when he looketh not for him, and in an hour that he is not aware of, And shall cut him asunder, and appoint him his portion with the hypocrites: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. Matthew 24:42-51

    Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh. Matthew 25:13

    Take ye heed, watch and pray: for ye know not when the time is. ... Watch ye therefore: for ye know not when the master of the house cometh, at even, or at midnight, or at the cockcrowing, or in the morning: Lest coming suddenly he find you sleeping. And what I say unto you I say unto all, Watch. Mark 13:33-37

    And take heed to yourselves, lest at any time your hearts be overcharged with surfeiting, and drunkenness, and cares of this life, and so that day come upon you unawares. For as a snare shall it come on all them that dwell on the face of the whole earth. Watch ye therefore, and pray always, that ye may be accounted worthy to escape all these things that shall come to pass, and to stand before the Son of man. Luke 24:34-36

  177. Baptize everyone in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost.
  178. Go ye therefore, ... baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Matthew 28:19

  179. Preach the gospel to every creature.
  180. (Don't forget the beetles!)
    Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature. Mark 16:14

  181. Don't stop non-Christians from casting out devils in Jesus's name.
  182. Master, we saw one casting out devils in thy name, and he followeth not us: and we forbad him, because he followeth not us. But Jesus said, Forbid him not: for there is no man which shall do a miracle in my name, that can lightly speak evil of me. Mark 9:38-39

  183. Give a cup of water to a Christian.
  184. Whosoever shall give you a cup of water to drink in my name, because ye belong to Christ, verily I say unto you, he shall not lose his reward. Mark 9:41

  185. Give a cup of water to a a little one in the name of a disciple.
  186. Whosoever shall give to drink unto one of these little ones a cup of cold water only in the name of a disciple, verily I say unto you, he shall in no wise lose his reward. Matthew 10:42

  187. Pay your taxes. Keep state and church separate.
  188. Render therefore unto Caesar the things which are Caesar's; and unto God the things that are God's. Matthew 22:21

    Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and to God the things that are God's. Mark 12:17

    Render therefore unto Caesar the things which be Caesar's, and unto God the things which be God's. Luke 20:25

  189. Don't wear long clothing, love being greeted, take the best seats, devour widows' houses, and make long prayers.
  190. Beware of the scribes, which love to go in long clothing, and love salutations in the marketplaces, And the chief seats in the synagogues, and the uppermost rooms at feasts: Which devour widows' houses, and for a pretence make long prayers: these shall receive greater damnation. Mark 12:38-40

    Beware of the scribes, which desire to walk in long robes, and love greetings in the markets, and the highest seats in the synagogues, and the chief rooms at feasts; Which devour widows' houses, and for a shew make long prayers: the same shall receive greater damnation. Luke 20:46-47

    But all their works they do for to be seen of men: they make broad their phylacteries, and enlarge the borders of their garments, And love the uppermost rooms at feasts, and the chief seats in the synagogues, And greetings in the markets, and to be called of men, Rabbi, Rabbi. Matthew 23:5-7

  191. Don't be deceived by false Christs.
  192. Take heed that no man deceive you. For many shall come in my name, saying, I am Christ; and shall deceive many. Matthew 24:4-5

    Take heed lest any man deceive you: For many shall come in my name, saying, I am Christ; and shall deceive many. Mark 13:5-6

    Take heed that ye be not deceived: for many shall come in my name, saying, I am Christ; and the time draweth near: go ye not therefore after them. Luke 21:8

  193. Don't worry about wars and rumors of wars.
  194. Ye shall hear of wars and rumours of wars: see that ye be not troubled: for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet. Matthew 24:6

    When ye shall hear of wars and rumours of wars, be ye not troubled: for such things must needs be; but the end shall not be yet. Mark 13:7

    Ye shall hear of wars and commotions, be not terrified: for these things must first come to pass; but the end is not by and by. Luke 21:9

  195. When the end of the world is about to happen and you have to testify, don't worry about what to say.
  196. (You won't have to say a word. Jesus will give you a wise mouth and the Holy Ghost will do the talking for you.)
    When they shall lead you, and deliver you up, take no thought beforehand what ye shall speak, neither do ye premeditate: but whatsoever shall be given you in that hour, that speak ye: for it is not ye that speak, but the Holy Ghost. Mark 13:11

    And it shall turn to you for a testimony. Settle it therefore in your hearts, not to meditate before what ye shall answer: For I will give you a mouth and wisdom, which all your adversaries shall not be able to gainsay nor resist. Luke 21:13-15

  197. If anyone says to you, "Lo, here is Christ" or "Lo, there he is", don't believe it.
  198. (Even if they do great signs and wonders.)
    If any man shall say unto you, Lo, here is Christ, or there; believe it not. For there shall arise false Christs, and false prophets, and shall shew great signs and wonders; insomuch that, if it were possible, they shall deceive the very elect. Matthew 24:23-24

    If any man shall say to you, Lo, here is Christ; or, lo, he is there; believe him not. Mark 13:21

  199. Learn a fig tree parable.
  200. Now learn a parable of the fig tree; When his branch is yet tender, and putteth forth leaves, ye know that summer is nigh: So likewise ye, when ye shall see all these things, know that it is near, even at the doors. Matthew 24:32-33

    Now learn a parable of the fig tree; When her branch is yet tender, and putteth forth leaves, ye know that summer is near. So ye in like manner, when ye shall see these things come to pass, know that it is nigh, even at the doors. Mark 13:23-24

  201. Give water to thirsty people.
  202. Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For ... I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink. Matthew 25:34-35

  203. Take in strangers.
  204. Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For ... I was a stranger, and ye took me in. Matthew 25:34-35

  205. Visit the sick.
  206. Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For ... I was a sick, and ye visited me. Matthew 25:34-36

  207. Come to prisoners.
  208. Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For ... I was in prison, and ye came unto me. Matthew 25:34-36

  209. Hear Jesus's word and believe on the one who sent him.
  210. He that heareth my word, and believeth on him that sent me, hath everlasting life, and shall not come into condemnation; but is passed from death unto life. John 5:24

  211. Believe in Jesus.
  212. (Or the wrath of God is on you and you'll be damned to hell.)
    Whosoever believeth in him [Jesus] should not perish, but have everlasting life. ... He that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. John 3:16-18

    He that believeth not the Son shall not see life; but the wrath of God abideth on him. John 3:36

    He that heareth my word, and believeth on him that sent me, hath everlasting life, and shall not come into condemnation; but is passed from death unto life. John 5:24

    He that believeth not shall be damned. Mark 16:16

  213. Kill anyone who refuses to be ruled by God (or Jesus).
  214. But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay them before me. Luke 19:27

  215. Be born again.
  216. Jesus answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God. John 3:3

    Jesus answered, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. John 3:3

  217. Eat Jesus's body and drink his blood.
  218. Except ye eat the flesh of the Son of man, and drink his blood, ye have no life in you. John 6:53-54

  219. Teach everyone all of Jesus's commandments.
  220. Teach all nations ... Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you. Matthew 28:18-20

17 April 2015

EJ&T Joel - Malachi: Get drunk and naked, prepare for war, and walk humbly with your God

In the Every Jot and Tittle project, I am listing all of the Bible's commandments from Genesis to Revelation, in accordance with Jesus's words in Matthew 5:18-19. I have no idea how many commandments I'll find, but Jewish tradition claims there are 613. See here for a list of those that I've found so far.

  1. Wake up, you drunkards; weep and howl, because your wine is cut off.
  2. Awake, ye drunkards, and weep; and howl, all ye drinkers of wine, because of the new wine; for it is cut off from your mouth. Joel 1:5

  3. Mourn like a virgin in sackcloth for the husband of her youth.
  4. Lament like a virgin girded with sackcloth for the husband of her youth. Joel 1:8

  5. Fast, call an assembly, blow a trumpet, and sound an alarm on God's holy mountain.
  6. Sanctify ye a fast, call a solemn assembly, gather the elders and all the inhabitants of the land into the house of the LORD your God, and cry unto the LORD. Joel 1:14

    Blow ye the trumpet in Zion, and sound an alarm in my holy mountain. Joel 2:1

    Blow the trumpet in Zion, sanctify a fast, call a solemn assembly. Gather the people, sanctify the congregation, assemble the elders, gather the children, and those that suck the breasts: let the bridegroom go forth of his chamber, and the bride out of her closet. Joel 2:15-16

    Assemble yourselves, and come, all ye heathen, and gather yourselves together round about: thither cause thy mighty ones to come down, O LORD. Let the heathen be wakened. Joel 3:11-12

    Gather yourselves together, yea, gather together, O nation not desired. Zephanaiah 2:3

  7. Prepare for war.
  8. Prepare war, wake up the mighty men, let all the men of war draw near; let them come up: Beat your plowshares into swords and your pruninghooks into spears. Joel 3:9-10

  9. Seek good and avoid evil.
  10. Seek good, and not evil. Amos 5:14

    Hate the evil, and love the good, and establish judgment in the gate. Amos 5:15

  11. Love mercy.
  12. Love mercy. Micah 6:8

  13. Walk humbly with God.
  14. Walk humbly with thy God. Micah 6:8

  15. Don't talk to your wife.
  16. Keep the doors of thy mouth from her that lieth in thy bosom. Micah 7:5

  17. Get drunk and naked.
  18. Drink thou also, and let thy foreskin be uncovered. Habakkuk 2:16

  19. Howl.
  20. Howl ye; for the day of the LORD is at hand; it shall come as a destruction from the Almighty. Isaiah 13:6

    Howl, O gate; cry, O city; thou, whole Palestina, art dissolved: for there shall come from the north a smoke, and none shall be alone in his appointed times. Isaiah 14:31

    Howl, ye ships of Tarshish; for it is laid waste. Isaiah 23:1

    Howl, ye inhabitants of the isle. Isaiah 23:6

    Howl, ye shepherds, and cry; and wallow yourselves in the ashes, ye principal of the flock: for the days of your slaughter and of your dispersions are accomplished; and ye shall fall like a pleasant vessel. Jeremaiah 25:34

    Howl and cry; tell ye it in Arnon, that Moab is spoiled. Jeremaiah 48:20

    Howl, O Heshbon, for Ai is spoiled: cry, ye daughters of Rabbah, gird you with sackcloth; lament, and run to and fro by the hedges. Jeremaiah 49:3

    Babylon is suddenly fallen and destroyed: howl for her. Jeremaiah 51:8

    Thus saith the Lord GOD; Howl ye, Woe worth the day! Ezekiel 30:2

    Howl, all ye drinkers of wine, because of the new wine; for it is cut off from your mouth. Joel 1:5

    Be ye ashamed, O ye husbandmen; howl, O ye vinedressers. Joel 1:11

    Howl, ye ministers of the altar: come, lie all night in sackcloth. Joel 1:13

    Howl, ye inhabitants of Maktesh, for all the merchant people are cut down; all they that bear silver are cut off. Zephaniah 1:11

    Go to now, ye rich men, weep and howl for your miseries that shall come upon you. James 5:1

  21. Consider your ways.
  22. Consider your ways. Haggai 1:7

  23. Go to the mountain and build God a house for him to take pleasure in.
  24. Go up to the mountain, and bring wood, and build the house; and I will take pleasure in it. Haggai 1:8

  25. Don't be like your fathers.
  26. Be ye not as your fathers, unto whom the former prophets have cried, saying, Thus saith the LORD of hosts; Turn ye now from your evil ways, and from your evil doings: but they did not hear, nor hearken unto me, saith the LORD. Zechariah 1:4

  27. Be silent.
  28. Be silent, O all flesh, before the LORD: for he is raised up out of his holy habitation. Zecharaiah 2:13

  29. Don't wish or plot evil against your brother.
  30. Let none of you imagine evil against his brother in your heart. Zechariah 7:10

    Let none of you imagine evil in your hearts against his neighbour. Zechariah 8:17

  31. Ask God for rain in the time of the latter rain.
  32. Ask ye of the LORD rain in the time of the latter rain Zecharaiah 10:1

  33. Feed the flock of the slaughter.
  34. Thus saith the LORD my God; Feed the flock of the slaughter. Zechariah 11:4

  35. Let the dead be dead, and let everyone else eat the flesh of another.
  36. That that dieth, let it die; and that that is to be cut off, let it be cut off; and let the rest eat every one the flesh of another. Zechariah 11:9

  37. Be kind to your wife.
  38. Let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth. ... Take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously. Malachi 2:15-16

  39. Bring the tithes into the storehouse.
  40. Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house. Malachi 3:10

EJ&T Ezekiel: Don't come near a menstruous woman

In the Every Jot and Tittle project, I am listing all of the Bible's commandments from Genesis to Revelation, in accordance with Jesus's words in Matthew 5:18-19. I have no idea how many commandments I'll find, but Jewish tradition claims there are 613. See here for a list of those that I've found so far.

  1. Repent.
  2. Thus saith the Lord GOD; Repent, and turn yourselves from your idols; and turn away your faces from all your abominations. Ezekiel 14:6

    Repent, and turn yourselves from all your transgressions ... Cast away from you all your transgressions, whereby ye have transgressed; and make you a new heart and a new spirit. Ezekiel 14:30

    Therefore also now, saith the LORD, turn ye even to me with all your heart, and with fasting, and with weeping, and with mourning ... Rend your heart, and not your garments. Joel 2:12-13

    In those days came John the Baptist, preaching in the wilderness of Judaea, And saying, Repent ye: for the kingdom of heaven is at hand. Matthew 3:1-2

    Jesus began to preach, and to say, Repent: for the kingdom of heaven is at hand. Matthew 4:17

    Now after that John was put in prison, Jesus came into Galilee, preaching the gospel of the kingdom of God, And saying, The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand: repent ye. Mark 1:14-15

    Peter said unto them, Repent. Acts 2:38

    Repent ye therefore, and be converted. Acts 3:19

  3. Don't be proud.
  4. Behold, this was the iniquity of thy sister Sodom, pride ... And they were haughty. Ezekiel 14:49-50

  5. Don't eat too much bread.
  6. Behold, this was the iniquity of thy sister Sodom ... fulness of bread. Ezekiel 14:49

  7. Keep yourself and your daughters busy.
  8. Behold, this was the iniquity of thy sister Sodom ... abundance of idleness was in her and in her daughters. Ezekiel 14:49

  9. Don't commit abominations in front of God.
  10. Behold, this was the iniquity of thy sister Sodom ... they .... committed abomination before me. Ezekiel 14:49-50

  11. Don't eat on mountains.
  12. If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right, and hath not eaten upon the mountains. Ezekiel 18:5-6

  13. Don't lift up your eyes to Israel's idols.
  14. If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right, and ... neither hath lifted up his eyes to the idols of the house of Israel. Ezekiel 18:5-6

  15. Don't defile your neighbor's wife.
  16. If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right, and ... neither hath defiled his neighbour's wife. Ezekiel 18:5-7

  17. Don't come near a menstruous woman.
  18. If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right, and ... neither hath come near to a menstruous woman. Ezekiel 18:5-6

  19. Return the collateral after a debt is paid.
  20. If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right, and ... hath restored to the debtor his pledge. Ezekiel 18:5-7

  21. Don't commit armed robbery.
  22. If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right, and ... hath spoiled none by violence. Ezekiel 18:5-7

  23. Feed the hungry.
  24. If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right, and ... hath given his bread to the hungry. Ezekiel 18:5-7

    Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was ahungered, and ye gave me meat. Matthew 25:34-36

  25. Clothe the naked.
  26. If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right, and ... hath covered the naked with a garment. Ezekiel 18:5-7

    Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For ... I was naked, and ye clothed me. Matthew 25:34-36

  27. Withdraw your hand from iniquity.
  28. If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right, and ... hath withdrawn his hand from iniquity. Ezekiel 18:5-8

  29. Deal truly.
  30. If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right ... to deal truly. Ezekiel 18:5-8

  31. Cast away the abominations of your eyes.
  32. Cast ye away every man the abominations of his eyes. Ezekiel 20:7

  33. Don't defile yourself with Egyptian idols.
  34. Defile not yourselves with the idols of Egypt. Ezekiel 20:7

14 April 2015

EJ&T Jeremiah and Lamentations: Eat your own goddamned sacrifices

In the Every Jot and Tittle project, I am listing all of the Bible's commandments from Genesis to Revelation, in accordance with Jesus's words in Matthew 5:18-19. I have no idea how many commandments I'll find, but Jewish tradition claims there are 613. See here for a list of those that I've found so far.

  1. Don't pray for certain people.
  2. Pray not thou for this people, neither lift up cry nor prayer for them, neither make intercession to me: for I will not hear thee. Jeremiah 7:16

    Pray not thou for this people, neither lift up a cry or prayer for them: for I will not hear them in the time that they cry unto me for their trouble. Jeremiah 11:14

    Then said the LORD unto me, Pray not for this people for their good. Jeremiah 14:11

  3. Eat your own sacrifices and burnt offerings. God never asked for them and doesn't want them.
  4. Put your burnt offerings unto your sacrifices, and eat flesh. For I spake not unto your fathers, nor commanded them in the day that I brought them out of the land of Egypt, concerning burnt offerings or sacrifices: Jeremiah 7:21-22

  5. Don't trust anyone. Not even your family, friends, or neighbors.
  6. Take ye heed every one of his neighbour, and trust ye not in any brother: for every brother will utterly supplant, and every neighbour will walk with slanders. And they will deceive every one his neighbour, and will not speak the truth: they have taught their tongue to speak lies, and weary themselves to commit iniquity. Thine habitation is in the midst of deceit; through deceit they refuse to know me, saith the Lord. Jeremiah 9:4-6

    Trust ye not in a friend, put ye not confidence in a guide. Micah 7:5

  7. Don't worry about the signs of heaven.
  8. Be not dismayed at the signs of heaven; for the heathen are dismayed at them. Jeremiah 10:2

  9. Don't be afraid of heathens.
  10. Be not afraid of them [heathens]; for they cannot do evil, neither also is it in them to do good. Jeremiah 10:5

  11. Don't listen to prophets.
  12. Thus saith the LORD of hosts, Hearken not unto the words of the prophets that prophesy unto you: they make you vain: they speak a vision of their own heart, and not out of the mouth of the LORD. Jeremiah 27:16

    Thus saith the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel; Let not your prophets and your diviners, that be in the midst of you, deceive you, neither hearken to your dreams which ye cause to be dreamed. For they prophesy falsely unto you in my name. Jeremiah 29:7-8

  13. Don't cry.
  14. Thus saith the LORD; Refrain thy voice from weeping, and thine eyes from tears: for thy work shall be rewarded, saith the LORD; and they shall come again from the land of the enemy. Jeremiah 31:16

  15. Free your Hebrew slaves.
  16. This is the word that came unto Jeremiah from the LORD ... that every man should let his manservant, and every man his maidservant, being an Hebrew or an Hebrewess, go free. Jeremiah 34:9

08 April 2015

EJ&T Isaiah: Thou shalt cast them away as a menstruous cloth and suck the breasts of kings

In the Every Jot and Tittle project, I am listing all of the Bible's commandments from Genesis to Revelation, in accordance with Jesus's words in Matthew 5:18-19. I have no idea how many commandments I'll find, but Jewish tradition claims there are 613. See here for a list of those that I've found so far.

There's a lot of crazy stuff in Isaiah, and some of it is written in the form of commands. Here are a few examples:
Prepare slaughter for his children for the iniquity of their fathers. Isaiah 14:21

Loose the sackcloth from off thy loins, and put off thy shoe from thy foot. Isaiah 20:2

Thou shalt cast them away as a menstruous cloth; thou shalt say unto it, Get thee hence. Isaiah 30:22

Tremble, ye women that are at ease; be troubled, ye careless ones: strip you, and make you bare, and gird sackcloth upon your loins. Isaiah 32:11

Come down, and sit in the dust, O virgin daughter of Babylon, sit on the ground ... Make bare the leg, uncover the thigh ... Thy nakedness shall be uncovered. Isaiah 47:2-3

Neither let the eunuch say, Behold, I am a dry tree. Isaiah 56:3

Draw near hither, ye sons of the sorceress, the seed of the adulterer and the whore. Isaiah 57:3

Thou shalt ... suck the breast of kings. Isaiah 60:16

These are commands from God, but are they commandments? Probably not. Some are directed at Isaiah, some to Babylonians, some to Israelites, some to eunuchs, sons of sorceresses, adulterers, and whores, And some of these commands are just trash talk directed at no one in particular. So I left them off the list.

I'll probably have to eliminate some of the crazier commands from the Psalms, Proverbs, and Ecclesiastes. I don't know what "Cast thy bread upon the waters" means, but it seems more like a suggestion than a commandment.

When I finish the list, I'll group them by topic and decide which to include or exclude. I'd appreciate any advice that you might have on this. I want to get the Bible's commandments right -- every jot and tittle!


Here are commands in Isaiah that I've included in the commandments.

  1. Don't bring God any more vain oblations.
  2. Bring no more vain oblations. Isaiah 1:13

  3. Wash yourself.
  4. Wash you, make you clean. Isaiah 1:16

  5. Seek judgment.
  6. Seek judgment. Isaiah 1:17

  7. Relieve the oppressed.
  8. Relieve the oppressed. Isaiah 1:17

  9. Judge the fatherless.
  10. Judge the fatherless. Isaiah 1:17

  11. Plead for the widow.
  12. Plead for the widow. Isaiah 1:17

  13. Don't value human life.
  14. Cease ye from man, whose breath is in his nostrils: for wherein is he to be accounted of? Isaiah 2:22

  15. Tell the righteous people that everything will be OK for them.
  16. Say ye to the righteous, that it shall be well with him: for they shall eat the fruit of their doings. Isaiah 3:10

  17. Make God holy.
  18. Sanctify the LORD of hosts himself. Isaiah 8:13

  19. Bind up Isaiah's testimony and seal the law among his disciples.
  20. Bind up the testimony, seal the law among my disciples. Isaiah 8:16

  21. Say to those who are afraid, "Be strong."
  22. Say to them that are of a fearful heart, Be strong, fear not: behold, your God will come with vengeance, even God with a recompence; he will come and save you. Isaiah 35:4

  23. Look at God and be saved.
  24. Look unto me, and be ye saved. Isaiah 45:22

  25. Remember things that happened a long time ago.
  26. Remember the former things of old. Isaiah 46:9