27 July 2008

Things that are easy for Allah

Some things are especially easy for Allah. Here's Allah's easy list from the Quran.

Making disbelievers' efforts fruitless.

Such have not believed. Therefore Allah maketh their deeds fruitless. And that is easy for Allah. 33:19

Leading disbelievers down the road to hell.

Lo! those who disbelieve and deal in wrong, Allah will never forgive them, neither will He guide them unto a road, Except the road of hell, wherein they will abide for ever. And that is ever easy for Allah. 4:168-9

Casting people into the Fire.

We shall cast him into Fire, and that is ever easy for Allah. 4:30

Doubly punishing Muhammad's wives for lewdness.

O ye wives of the Prophet! Whosoever of you committeth manifest lewdness, the punishment for her will be doubled, and that is easy for Allah. 33:30

12 July 2008

Kafir girl blogs the Quran (so I don't have to)

I know I've been ignoring the Quran lately, and I feel bad about that.

I've often thought I should just start at the beginning and blog my way through the whole damned thing. But it's such a dreadful book, I just can't make myself do it. But now I don't have to. Kafir girl is doing it for me. (And she's doing a better job than I ever could!)

Now if only the atheist girls would blog the Bible and Book of Mormon...

11 July 2008

Holding the Holy Host Hostage

For those who haven't heard the whole story, you can read all about it at PZ's blog. But the short story is this: Webster Cook, a student at the University of Central Florida, went to mass to receive the Eucharist, but rather than consummating the communion by swallowing, he took the host out of his mouth and walked off with it. A clear case of Communion Interruptus. Holy Fucking Host, Batman!

Of course something like that doesn't happen without Bill Donohue and the Catholic League finding out about it. (They have video cameras in every Catholic church that League volunteers monitor continuously.) And when they did, all hell broke loose.

Which gives me an idea. Why don't we all go and do likewise? Go to mass, receive communion, and take the Holy Host home as a hostage. (It's easy to do nowadays. You can receive communion in your hand now standing up, rather than on the tongue while kneeling.) Every time we do that we'll be saving Jesus from being eaten alive by his followers (and a kitten from being killed by God).

Of course, I don't know what we can do with all the spare Jesuses. But I guess we could send them to PZ and let him deal with them.

02 July 2008

Is there anything the God of the Bible could do that a believer wouldn't call good?

I recently asked the question, "Is it wrong to burn people to death?", and although there was a lot of discussion about it in the comments, there was no clear answer from any believer. The best (and pretty much only) answer seemed to be that yes, it is wrong to burn people to death today, but it wasn't wrong back in the day when God told people to do it and did it himself on occasion. You see, back then there were no laws against it and it was an accepted form of punishment. God was just doing and telling others to do what everyone else was doing. What could be wrong with that?

It reminded me of the "answer" given by John Yoo when asked by John Conyers if there was anything the president could not order to be done to a suspect if it was necessary for national defense. When Mr. Yoo refused to answer, Conyers asked, "Could the president order a suspect to be buried alive?" Of course that question wasn't answered either.

So it got me thinking. Is there anything that the God of the Bible could do that a believer wouldn't call good? Could he, for example:

  1. Bury people alive?
    Korah, Dathan, and Abiram ... came out, and stood in the door of their tents, and their wives, and their sons, and their little children. And Moses said, Hereby ye shall know that the LORD hath sent me .... If these men die the common death of all men ... then the LORD hath not sent me. But if the LORD make ... the earth open her mouth, and swallow them up, with all that appertain unto them, and they go down quick into the pit; then ye shall understand that these men have provoked the LORD. And it came to pass ... that ... the earth opened her mouth, and swallowed them up.... They, and all that appertained to them, went down alive into the pit, and the earth closed upon them: and they perished from among the congregation. And all Israel that were round about them fled at the cry of them: for they said, Lest the earth swallow us up also. Numbers 16:27-34
  2. Burn people to death?
    And there came out a fire from the LORD, and consumed the two hundred and fifty men that offered incense. Numbers 16:35 (See here for more examples.)
  3. Burn people forever after they die (but keep them alive to torture them)?
    The same shall drink of the wine of the wrath of God ...he shall be tormented with fire and brimstone ... And the smoke of their torment ascendeth up for ever and ever. Revelation 14:10-11
  4. Force parents to eat their children and friends to eat each other?
    And I will cause them to eat the flesh of their sons and the flesh of their daughters, and they shall eat every one the flesh of his friend. Jeremiah 19:9
  5. Force people to kill their brothers and eat themselves?
    Through the wrath of the LORD of hosts ... no man shall spare his brother. And he shall snatch on the right hand, and be hungry; and he shall eat on the left hand, and they shall not be satisfied: they shall eat every man the flesh of his own arm. Isaiah 9:19-20
  6. Force people to cut off their noses and women to pluck off their breasts?
    And I will set my jealousy against thee, and they shall deal furiously with thee: they shall take away thy nose and thine ears. ... Thou shalt even drink it and suck it out, and thou shalt ... pluck off thine own breasts: for I have spoken it, saith the Lord GOD. Ezekiel 23:25-37
  7. Kill a newborn baby to punish its parents?
    Because by this deed thou hast given great occasion to the enemies of the LORD to blaspheme, the child also that is born unto thee shall surely die. 2 Samuel 12:14
  8. Dash little children to pieces and rip up pregnant women?
    Samaria shall become desolate; for she hath rebelled against her God: they shall fall by the sword: their infants shall be dashed in pieces, and their women with child shall be ripped up. Hosea 13:16
  9. Cause birth defects and spread dung on peoples' faces?
    Behold, I will corrupt your seed and spread dung upon your faces. Malachi 2:3
  10. Order a woman's hand to be cut off "without pity" for touching a man's genitals?
    When men strive together one with another, and the wife of the one draweth near for to deliver her husband out of the hand of him that smiteth him, and putteth forth her hand, and taketh him by the secrets: Then thou shalt cut off her hand, thine eye shall not pity her. Deuteronomy 25:11-12

Of course, this is just a sample of what God has done. See here for a more extensive list of biblical cruelties.

Are all of these things good just because God did them? Just like whatever Bush does is legal because he is president?

If there a sane, moral Christian out there, I'd love to hear your response.