16 June 2010

Surah 2: The Cow, Part 1 -- Allah is wise, mysterious, funny

Surah 2 is the longest surah in the Quran, so it's going to take a while to get through it. I can only take so much of this stuff at a time.

It starts, as many surahs do, with three Arabic letters.

Alif. Lam. Mim. 2:1

No one knows what they mean or why they are there. But I have a theory.

The mysterious letters (Alif. Lam. Mim.) are the Quranic equivalent of W.T.F.

Allah is wise, mysterious, funny.

But he has a serious side, too. Take the next verse where he says:

This is the Scripture whereof there is no doubt. 2:2a

The Quran is true because the Quran says it's true, just like the Bible and the Book of Mormon. There is no doubt about it.

It's useful to those that "ward off evil," believe unseen things that Muhammad reveals to them, and are absolutely certain that they will survive their own death.

You know, the successful people. The Muslims.

[The Quran is] a guidance unto those who ward off evil. Who believe in the Unseen .. And who believe in that which is revealed unto thee (Muhammad) ... and are certain of the Hereafter. ... These are the successful. 2:2b-4

As for the other people, the disbelievers, Allah has already taken care of them. He has "sealed their hearing and their hearts" and put a covering on their eyes so they won't be able to believe.

As for the Disbelievers, Whether thou warn them or thou warn them not it is all one for them; they believe not. Allah hath sealed their hearing and their hearts, and on their eyes there is a covering. 2:6-7a

So if you don't believe by now, you never will. Allah has hardened your heart and blinded you to the truth. There's nothing you, or anyone else, can or should do about it.

And what happens to the disbelievers?

Theirs will be an awful doom. 2:7

You see, to Allah unbelief is like a disease. And he increases the disease. He's a spiritual anti-doctor.

In their hearts is a disease, and Allah increaseth their disease. 2:10

So if you don't believe in the unseen things that Muhammad revealed, you're pretty much out of luck. Allah has already blinded your eyes (so you won't be able to see unseen things), hardened your heart (so you'll think it's cruel for Allah to "doom" disbelievers for not believing things that he prevented them from believing), and increased your disease of unbelief. Yours will be an awful doom. Sorry about that.

Allah has made it impossible for you to believe as the foolish believe.

And when it is said unto them: believe as the people believe, they say: shall we believe as the foolish believe? are not they indeed the foolish? But they know not. 2:13

And after you die he'll torture you forever for it.


Bogging the Quran
Surah 2:14-24 -- Produce a surah the like thereof

7 comments:

Matthew Blanchette said...

Wow... maybe you should change the name of the blog to Diseases in Unbelief? ;-)

Just kidding, Steve; I like the way you tore apart the completely random letters at the beginning of the surah, as well...

I am the wise fool. said...

Gee, it Qu'ran had such a nice beginning in your previous post. It sure went to hell in hand basket rather quickly!

It's interesting to see the different perspectives between Jewish, Christian, and Muslim scriptures.

Jewish: Yup, we Jews the Chosen People, but you Gentiles can worship too if you want.

Christian: Tell everyone about the Good News so that everyone will get the chance to choose God. (Although, they have already been chosen since before man was made according to the theology of Election.)

Muslim: If you were brought up Muslim, you are in. Everyone else: sucks to be you!

I have to say (as a Gentile), between the three I think I like the Jewish approach the best.

kat said...

Verse 2---This is a Book; in it is Guidance sure, without doubt, for those who are "muttaqueen"(Arabic)
Cooment----"Mutaqueen" means--one who has Taqwa, and Taqwa means Love of God/God-awareness.

Verse 3-5 is a definition of one who has God awareness (Taqwa)
The criteria is as follows---1)Belief in Unseen (for example---God)2)who pray, 3)do charity 4) believe in revelation (both this one andprevious ones)5) believe in hereafter.

Verses 6 to 20 describe people who reject goodness/guidance and the various stages of such people---1)those who do so out of ignorance, 2)those who do so because they are hypocrites, 3)and others who do so because they want to cause "mischief on earth".
Verse 6---As to those who reject faith, it is the same to them whether you warn them or do not warn them; they will not beleive.
Comment---God has given us all free-will---we can choose to use this free-will for better or for worse. (right belief inspires right intentions that lead to right actions for the benefit of all of God's creations)

twillight said...

To I am the wise fool :

christianity: If you are not one of us, you'll be annihilated. (according to the Bible)

muslims: If you are not one of us, you'll be torchured forever. (according to the Quran)

jews: If you are not one of us, you're worse than animals. (according to the Talmud)


I think from this approach christianity is best, and jews are the worst. But all three are terrible.

Matthew Blanchette said...

Hey, well at least the Jews are nice about it, nowadays... :-S

TaoCat said...

@kat-
"Comment---God has given us all free-will---we can choose to use this free-will for better or for worse. (right belief inspires right intentions that lead to right actions for the benefit of all of God's creations) "

You do realise that's not what the words say, right? It kinda implies that Allah, the just, merciful pig-lover has blinded everybody not already signed up for the lovely program of hatred and misogyny? Just sayin'.

kat said...

an interesting point TaoCat
verse 6
As to those who reject faith
It is the same to them whether you warn them or do not warn them;
they will not believe.
verse 7
God has set a seal on their hearts and on their hearing.
and on their eyes is a veil;
Great is the chastisement they incur.

Free-will---verse 6 starts with the phrase "as to those who reject faith"---meaning that a person uses his free-will to reject a "proposition"--which in this case is guidance/goodness. After this choice has been made---God may choose to seal their hearts....etc.
Faith---the Quran rejects blind faith and encourages the use of the intellect and reason for "belief"(---this is spelled out later in the story of Prophet Abraham(pbuh) and his struggle with belief)

I appreciate your reading my comment---thankyou. If you find my views offensive, you could skip them?