Alma 4: Alma Appoints Nephihah

The Nephites began to enjoy peace in the sixth year of the reign of the Judges. They were still recovering from the nasty war, in which so many of their people had died and much of their economy was destroyed (flocks, herds, fields of grain, etc.)

Now it came to pass in the sixth year of the reign of the judges over the people of Nephi, there were no contentions nor wars in the land of Zarahemla; 4.1 

But the people were afflicted, yea, greatly afflicted for the loss of their brethren, and also for the loss of their flocks and herds, and also for the loss of their fields of grain, which were trodden under foot and destroyed by the Lamanites. 4.2

Everyone decided that God must have sent the destruction upon them because of their bad behavior. It made sense--he was always doing stuff like that. For a while everyone was on their best behavior. Many new church members were added during this time, and it was a time of peace and prosperity.

And so great were their afflictions that every soul had cause to mourn; and they believed that it was the judgments of God sent upon them because of their wickedness and their abominations; therefore they were awakened to a remembrance of their duty. 4.3

And it came to pass in the seventh year of the reign of the judges there were about three thousand five hundred souls that united themselves to the church of God and were baptized. And thus endeth the seventh year of the reign of the judges over the people of Nephi; and there was continual peace in all that time. 4.5

But, one short year later, the people became proud. You see, everyone managed to get REALLY rich in the three years since the war. They had abundance of fine-twilled linen, and silks, and silver, and gold, and flocks... They had all manner of precious things.

And as if being proud wasn't bad enough, they started wearing costly apparel.

And it came to pass in the eighth year of the reign of the judges, that the people of the church began to wax proud, because of their exceeding riches, and their fine silks, and their fine-twined linen, and because of their many flocks and herds, and their gold and their silver, and all manner of precious things, which they had obtained by their industry; and in all these things were they lifted up in the pride of their eyes, for they began to wear very costly apparel. 4.6

All of the usual things follow: Some of the people resist the urge to be proud and wear fancy clothes, and they took care of the needy and continued to be good people.

Now this was the cause of much affliction to Alma, yea, and to many of the people whom Alma had consecrated to be teachers, and priests, and elders over the church; yea, many of them were sorely grieved for the wickedness which they saw had begun to be among their people. 4.7

For they saw and beheld with great sorrow that the people of the church began to be lifted up in the pride of their eyes, and to set their hearts upon riches and upon the vain things of the world, that they began to be scornful, one towards another, and they began to persecute those that did not believe according to their own will and pleasure. 4.8

The whole situation was getting so bad that the church members were actually becoming more wicked than the nonbelievers. That doesn't happen too often!

And thus, in this eighth year of the reign of the judges, there began to be great contentions among the people of the church; yea, there were envyings, and strife, and malice, and persecutions, and pride, even to exceed the pride of those who did not belong to the church of God. 4.9

And thus ended the eighth year of the reign of the judges; and the wickedness of the church was a great stumbling-block to those who did not belong to the church; and thus the church began to fail in its progress. 4.11

Alma decided to appoint someone else as Chief Judge, so he could focus all of his energy on preaching. He selected a wise elder of the church named Nehpihah. Alma retained the position of High Priest for himself.

And he selected a wise man who was among the elders of the church, and gave him power according to the voice of the people, that he might have power to enact laws according to the laws which had been given, and to put them in force according to the wickedness and the crimes of the people. 4.16 

Now this man's name was Nephihah, and he was appointed chief judge; and he sat in the judgment-seat to judge and to govern the people. 4.17

Now Alma did not grant unto him the office of being high priest over the church, but he retained the office of high priest unto himself; but he delivered the judgment-seat unto Nephihah. 4.18

Will Alma be able to save the people from their pride, wickedness, and fancy clothes? You'll just have to wait to find out.

A Darwin quote for Darwin Day

For Darwin Day, I thought I'd (re)post one of my favorite Darwin quotes. Here it is:

I cannot persuade myself that a beneficent & omnipotent God would have designedly created the Ichneumonidae with the express intention of their feeding within the living bodies of caterpillars, or that a cat should play with mice. -- From a letter to Asa Gray, 22 May 1860

The Ichneumonidae is a family of wasps. A very big family. It is, in fact, one of the largest families in the largest class of animals, the insects. There are over 60,000 species of ichneumonid wasps, each one, according to creationists, specially designed by God. My question for them is the same as Charles Darwin's: Why? Why would a beneficent and omnipotent God do such a thing?

To understand the question, it is necessary to know a bit about the ichneumonids. First of all, most are parasitoids, which means that their larvae develop inside the body of a living host, which they slowly eat alive. Eventually, when the wasp larvae pupate, they erupt out of the body of the host that they have gradually consumed, tormented, and destroyed as larvae.

It is easy to see how such a thing could exist from an evolutionary standpoint. The body of a caterpillar is good food for larvae. It's not surprising that some organisms have evolved to take advantage of it. But what kind of a God would purposefully design it to be that way?

I have heard five different answers:

1. God originally made everything good; there was no suffering or death until the fall of Adam. Then all hell broke loose. Animals immediately began to kill and eat each other, and predators, parasites, parasitoids, and pathogens roamed the earth. (Creation Ministries)

2. God made things nasty right from the start just to show us how important we are to him. He knew that Adam would sin, so he made nature cruel to show us the serious nature of sin. (Dembski's Defective Design Inference)

3. God made everything good and then Satan messed everything up. (Gregory Boyd's Cosmic Warfare Theodicy)

4. God likes it just fine the way it is. He created it that way for is own pleasure. He likes to watch things suffer. (David Snoke)

5. God couldn't help it and had nothing to do with it. He would have liked to create a kind and peaceful world, but he had to let things play out according to the laws of nature, over which he had no control. So the ichneumonid wasps just evolved, along with everything else, over millions of years while God sadly watched from a distance, unable to affect the outcome. (Ken Miller)

For each of these answers, though, I have a question.

1. How did things change so quickly? Were the 60,000 ichneumonid species specially created by God the moment Adam sinned? Or did God magically turn 60,000 butterfly species into parasitic wasps? Or did they all evolve (super)naturally in a few thousand years?

2. How do the ichneumonids teach us about sin? Until about the time of Darwin no one (except God) even knew they existed? Yet God created them just for us, just to teach us a lesson?

3. So Satan created the Ichneumonids? Along with scorpions, spiders, snakes, and sharks? He must have been a busy guy!

4. How could a kind and loving God create things just to watch them suffer?

5. A God who can't create or control anything isn't a God at all.

Here are some cool videos about the Ichneumonids.

The first one is from David Attenborough's marvelous "Life in the Undergrowth."

And here's one showing a Ichneumonid wasp (Megarhyssa sp.) drilling through the bark of an oak tree to deposit an egg in the tunnel of the siricid wood wasp, whose larva the Maegarhyssa lava will eat alive from the inside in the traditional Ichneumonid fashion (just like God intended it to be).

Alma 3: God Set a Mark Upon Them

The war was over. The Nephites buried their dead quickly, where they died, without even counting them. There were too many to count.

And it came to pass that the Nephites who were not slain by the weapons of war, after having buried those who had been slain -- now the number of the slain were not numbered, because of the greatness of their number -- after they had finished burying their dead they all returned to their lands, and to their houses, and their wives, and their children. 3.1

When the soldiers returned home, things had changed. Many of their wives and children were dead, the crops were trampled, and even some of their flocks were killed.

Now many women and children had been slain with the sword, and also many of their flocks and their herds; and also many of their fields of grain were destroyed, for they were trodden down by the hosts of men. 3.2

But that's enough about the Nephites for now. Let's talk about the Amlicites and Lamanites a bit more. How do you know one when you see one? That's easy: the Amlicites put a mark on their heads, and they don't shave their heads. Lamanites shave their heads, and don't wear any clothes besides leather loincloths and armor.

And the Amlicites were distinguished from the Nephites, for they had marked themselves with red in their foreheads after the manner of the Lamanites; nevertheless they had not shorn their heads like unto the Lamanites. 3.4

Now the heads of the Lamanites were shorn; and they were naked, save it were skin which was girded about their loins, and also their armor, which was girded about them, and their bows, and their arrows, and their stones, and their slings, and so forth. 3.5

Lamanites also have dark skin. God cursed them and turned them dark because their ancestors (Laman and Lemuel) rebelled against their brothers: Nephi, Jacob, Joseph and Sam.

And the skins of the Lamanites were dark, according to the mark which was set upon their fathers, which was a curse upon them because of their transgression and their rebellion against their brethren, who consisted of Nephi, Jacob, and Joseph, and Sam, who were just and holy men. 3.6

And their brethren sought to destroy them, therefore they were cursed; and the Lord God set a mark upon them, yea, upon Laman and Lemuel, and also the sons of Ishmael, and Ishmaelitish women. 3.7

The mark is also intended to keep the Nephites from "mixing" with the Lamanites.

And this was done that their seed might be distinguished from the seed of their brethren, that thereby the Lord God might preserve his people, that they might not mix and believe in incorrect traditions which would prove their destruction. 3.8

God will mark any children resulting from Nephite/Lamanite sex. He will also mark anyone who is otherwise "Led away" by the Lamanites.

 And it came to pass that whosoever did mingle his seed with that of the Lamanites did bring the same curse upon his seed. 3.9 

Therefore, whosoever suffered himself to be led away by the Lamanites was called under that head, and there was a mark set upon him. 3.10 

All of these things are reiterated many times. I'm guessing this will be on the test.

Now we will return again to the Amlicites, for they also had a mark set upon them; yea, they set the mark upon themselves, yea, even a mark of red upon their foreheads. 3.13

Thus the word of God is fulfilled, for these are the words which he said to Nephi: Behold, the Lamanites have I cursed, and I will set a mark on them that they and their seed may be separated from thee and thy seed, from this time henceforth and forever, except they repent of their wickedness and turn to me that I may have mercy upon them. 3.14

 And again: I will set a mark upon him that mingleth his seed with thy brethren, that they may be cursed also. 3.15

 And again, I say he that departeth from thee shall no more be called thy seed; and I will bless thee, and whomsoever shall be called thy seed, henceforth and forever; and these were the promises of the Lord unto Nephi and to his seed. 3.17

Are there any questions? Good. Okay, back to the story.

A few days after their big defeat, the Lamanites decide they want to try again. They send another army to the same battlefield that the Amlicites first fought in, and are quickly defeated again. Shucks!

Now it came to pass that not many days after the battle which was fought in the land of Zarahemla, by the Lamanites and the Amlicites, that there was another army of the Lamanites came in upon the people of Nephi, in the same place where the first army met the Amlicites. 3.20 

But he sent up a numerous army against them; and they went up and slew many of the Lamanites, and drove the remainder of them out of the borders of their land. 3.23

So there was peace in the land again. For "a time".

And then they returned again and began to establish peace in the land, being troubled no more for a time with their enemies. 3.24

Probably until the next chapter.

Apparently God has changed his mind about the Seahawks

I guess it shouldn't surprise us anymore. God has changed his mind about lots of things.

In the 19th century, he changed his mind about slavery; in the 20th century, he changed his mind about women's rights; in the 21st century, he seems to be changing his mind (or perhaps "evolving") on the topic of homosexuality. And now, in 2014, he has changed his mind about the Seahawks.

It's hard to make predictions with such a changeable god.

As I pointed out in my failed Super Bowl prophecy, God hates the Seahawks. Or at least he did when he said these words:

And these are they which ye shall have in abomination among the fowls ... they are an abomination: the eagle, and the ossifrage, and the ospray. Leviticus 11:13. ("Ospray" in the KJV refers to the osprey or "Sea Hawk.")

And yet the Seahawks won the Super Bowl 43:8.

How could this happen?

The answer lies (somehow) in Isaiah 43:8.

Bring forth the blind people that have eyes, and the deaf that have ears.

Sometimes you have to look at a verse just right, while cocking your head just so, until it's meaning becomes clear. And when you do that with this verse while applying it to yesterday's Super Bowl Game, you get Seahawks 43, Broncos 8 (with the chapter and verse number corresponding to the score, and the book to Isaiah Kacyvenski, a former linebacker for the Seattle Seahawks).

For as Jesus supposedly said to someone, "Blessed are your eyes, for they see: and your ears, for they hear."

Or something like that.

---

9 Feb 14 update: As Roland points out in the comments, the Seahawks have a deaf fullback on their team named Derek Coleman, which perfectly completes this amazing post-hoc Bible prophecy. The Bible predicted the exact score of this year's Super Bowl! It just goes to show that the Bible never fails to predict every event. You just have to have the proper faith and look hard enough after the event occurs for the hidden message buried beneath the much more obvious absurdities and contradictions.

Biblical Super Bowl Prophecy: Broncos 21, Seahawks 17

There's an interesting Christian Post article entitled Fifteen Bible Verses that suggest the Denver Broncos will win the Super Bowl.

And the article is right about that: the Bible predicts that the Broncos will win. But does it also predict the score? I think it does, and here's how.

The outcome of the game is fairly obvious, since the Bible tells us how God feels about broncos and seahawks. And on that there is simply no contest. God hates seahawks and loves broncos.

How do we know that God hates seahawks? Well "seahawk" is one of the nicknames for the osprey (Pandion haliaetus). And here's what God said about the osprey ("ospray" in the King James Version):

And these are they which ye shall have in abomination among the fowls ... they are an abomination: the eagle, and the ossifrage, and the ospray. Leviticus 11:13.

Okay, but how about broncos? Well, the Bible doesn't use the word "bronco" but it does talk about horses. And in the Bible, God seems to like them. Here's what he says about them in the Book of Job.

Hast thou given the horse strength? hast thou clothed his neck with thunder? Canst thou make him afraid as a grasshopper? the glory of his nostrils is terrible ... He mocketh at fear, and is not affrighted. Job 39:18-22

So the Bible says that broncos are strong, brave, glorious, and fearless; ospreys are abominations. So it seems there's really no need to play tomorrow's game. The Broncos will win, if God has anything to say about it. (And God has something to say about every football game.)

Okay, so the Bible predicts a Bronco win. But by how much?

Well, that's easy. We just count up the number of verses that favor each team.

Here are the verses that favor the Seahawks.

1. Dan [Tony McDaniel] shall be a serpent ... that biteth the horse heels. Genesis 49:17

2. When thou goest out to battle ... and seest horses ... be not afraid of them. Deuteronomy 20:1

3. Be not afraid because of them ... thou shalt hough their horses. Joshua 11:6, 9

4. They arose and fled in the twilight, and left ... their horses ... and fled for their life. 2 Kings 7:7

5. Be ye not as the horse, or as the mule, which have no understanding: whose mouth must be held in with bit and bridle. Psalm 32:9

6. An horse is a vain thing for safety: neither shall he deliver any by his great strength. Psalm 33:17
   (Is this verse referring to Rahim Moore, the Bronco's safety?)

7. He delighteth not in the strength of the horse: he taketh not pleasure in the legs of a man. Psalm 147:10

8. A whip for the horse. Proverbs 26:3
   [The Broncos will get whipped?]

9. Their horses ... shall become as women. Jeremiah 50:37

10. They are cruel, and will not shew mercy: their voice shall roar like the sea, and they shall ride upon horses. Jeremiah 6:23, 50:42
    [The roaring sea-like voice refers to Seattle's 12th man, and the Seahawks will ride the Broncos as though they were horses.]

11. With thee will I break in pieces the horse. Jeremiah 51:21

12. I ... have taken away your horses; and I have made the stink of your camps to come up unto your nostrils. Amos 4:10

13. Shall horses run upon the rock? Amos 6:12
    [An obvious reference to Bobby Wagner, the rock of the Seahawks' defense.]

14. And it shall come to pass in that day, saith the LORD, that I will cut off thy horses. Micah 5:10
    [When the Broncos come to pass, the Legion of Boom will cut it off.]

15. In that day, saith the LORD, I will smite every horse with astonishment ... and will smite every horse .. with blindness. Zechariah 12:4

16. And he answered, saying, My name is Legion [of Boom]: for we are many. Mark 5:9, Luke 8:30

17. These ... shall give their power and strength unto the beast. Revelation 17:13

And here are the verses that favor the Broncos.

1. Behold, there appeared ... horses of fire. 2 Kings 2:11

2. The LORD had made ... a noise of horses, even the noise of a great host. 2 Kings 7:6
3. The horse is prepared against the day of battle. Proverbs 21:31

4. Their horses' hoofs shall be counted like flint. Isaiah 5:28

5. That led them ... as an horse in the wilderness, that they should not stumble. Isaiah 63:13

6. His horses are swifter than eagles [or Seahawks]. Woe unto us! for we are spoiled. Jeremiah 4:13

7. The snorting of his horses was heard ... the whole land trembled at the sound of the neighing of his strong ones. Jeremiah 8:16

8. How canst thou contend with horses? Jeremiah 12:5

9. Harness the horses ... and stand forth with your helmets. Jeremiah 46:4

10. Come up, ye horses; and rage ... let the mighty men come forth. Jeremiah 46:9

11. At the noise of the stamping of the hoofs of his strong horses.... Jeremiah 47:3

12. The horses to come up as the rough caterpillars. Jeremiah 51:27

13. No ... foot of beast shall pass through it. Ezekiel 29:11
    [The Bronco defense will stop the Beast (Marshawn Lynch).]

14. Their horses also are swifter than the leopards, and are more fierce than the evening wolves. Habakkuk 1:8

15. Thou didst walk through the sea[hawks] with thine horses. Habakkuk 3:15

16. The LORD of hosts ... hath made them as his goodly horse in the battle. Zechariah 10:3

17. And I saw, and behold a white horse ... and he went forth conquering, and to conquer. Revelation 6:2

18. The heads of the horses were as the heads of lions; and out of their mouths issued fire and smoke and brimstone. Revelation 9:17

19. And I saw ... them that had gotten the victory over the beast. Revelation 15:2
    [The Broncos will get victory over the beast (Marshawn Lynch) and the Seahawks.]

20. And I saw heaven opened, and behold a white horse. Revelation 19:1

21. The armies which were in heaven followed him upon white horses. Revelation 19:14

So the final score will be: Broncos 21, Seahawks 17.